So here we are...

What makes us who we are? A lifetime of experiences? A single chance encounter? Or is it all predetermined? Fate... Destiny... Chance... Coincidence. I don't know who I am anymore. I used to. Maybe. Maybe that was simply illusion. So very little makes me happy. I don't even know when that slippery slope became so steep. Only now do I begin to realize. Only now do I see just what it means. Only now do I recognize the fear of what might come to be. Or not come to be. Can you be in love with more than one person? What happens when you are? What happens when one doesn't love you back, and the other no longer even cares? What happens when where you should be, you no longer know how to be? You no longer know what to be? What happens when what you used to know as The Rule is no longer The Rule? I want it to be easy again. I need it to be easy again. The struggles... how much can one bear, I wonder, before there's just nothing left. No reason remaining. I am now where you once were. Broken? Lost? Empty? Appropriate adjectives, I think. I didn't realize the depth of it all. Until it was far too late, naturally. I miss you, and you don't even know it. I miss ME. And I know nothing but.